It's so easy to feel like you are losing your identity when you become a mum. The second you bring your beautiful first little baby into the world and your life as mother begins. It's busy, it's constant, it's repetitive. With a million and one lists of things you need to do , as well as all the things you'd like to. Attending to your children's needs, educating, changing, feeding, bathing, taking care of the house, taking care of yourself, dinner making, errand running - the list in never ending.
It's like a switch clicks after you give birth, you are indefinitely in Mum Mode from then on. I remember, a month or so after my oldest was born, and I was beginning to adjust to life as a mother, I began thinking..'When will I feel like me again'?
Going for days not getting dressed, barely having enough time to shower let alone put on make up, cook meals or go out. It seems like you'll never find yourself again, you'll never get back to who you once were.
The one thing no one tells you when you have a baby, is you will feel like you'll have no idea if what you are doing is right. 'Is this what I should be doing? Is this normal?'
The early days are draining, exhausting, you have no time for yourself, and you are so distracted you don't really even have the time to think about the fact you don't have the time for yourself! Then gradually you start getting back into a routine, baby sleeps and wakes at regular times (hopefully), so you can plan your day around that. You know when you can have a shower, when you have 5-10 minutes to look presentable and after a while you even have your evenings back.
This all happened to me, and it absolutely happened again the second time around, and the third. The early days of motherhood will look like this for everyone. You might think you start to feel your old self, your old life slipping away, you might start to worry "I don't feel like me anymore" - It's not a motherhood identity crisis, this is all totally normal.
A few months after my oldest was born, and I had begun to settle into life as a mother, something hit me - I am me, just not the same me I used to be.
When you become a mother, you will lose part of yourself, and I can guarantee you will not be able to do some of the things you used to do.
You will never be the Old You again. And that is awesome. Becoming a mother transforms you. The experience will completely change you in ways you could never imagine, ways no-one could ever describe to you. You will feel wonderful, powerful, magical.
This is the New You.
And you are perfect.
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